Porteños are very vocal, boisterous and passionate people. People will randomly talk to you, touch you, and pass judgement on you. At first, this really freaked me out. Why are they talking to me? Why do I have to kiss random strangers every time I see them? Looks are exchanged that speak a thousand words when you walk around. Men cat call, grab you arm, and call you names as you walk by.
"que linda"
"que hermosa"
"mi amor"
"princesa"
"dios mio"
Cars will honk, men will shout from windows or apartments and cars, whistling and purring are also common calls. At first this really freaked me out. I was unnerved, thinking these men would probably abduct or mug me. However, this is a harmless act of Porteño culture.
Argentine men are very assertive, daring and straight forward. They are blunt, which to me still comes off as rude sometimes. They do not take lightly to rejection. As creepy and overwhelming as this can be I have to remind myself that this is part of their culture.
Last night I went to my favorite club with Olivia. There was a large group of Americans students there visiting Buenos Aires for a few days. They were all whispering about how scary the men are here. When I went up to talk to these Americans, many looked at me like I was speaking Spanish to them. They gave me looks like "why is she talking to me" and only one girl replied when I began talking to them... And suddenly I realized this is where my reverse culture shock begins.
Americans can be very cold. Here, everywhere you go you are granted with a kiss, every time you come in to contact with another person. Argentines genuinely want to know how you are, and how was your day has been. When I walked up to these Americans, they radiated the cold, arrogant stereotype we have shamefully earned. I am sure I did too at first, the whole phenomenon of Argentine men really freaked me out too. I used to be very taken aback when random people would came over to talk to me and my friends at clubs, restaurants and on the colectivos and proceed to insert their opinons shamelessly. At some undefinable moment in the past four months, I guess I learned to really enjoy this normalcy.
The most rewarding aspect of this experience was to be culturally immersed. I can only hope that I return home with some of the warmth of Argentine culture. Their hospitality is unparalleled. They want to talk to you, they are interested and very caring. For example, last night at the club, after many introductions numerous Argentines asked Olivia with concern about her home in Mystic, Connecticut. They were very aware and alarmed about Sandy and wanted to know if her family and home were safe and undamaged. This really touched the both of us. There is so much love and concern here. Most everywhere you go you are greeted by a kind smile and receptive manuerisms. It is also nice to be told you are beautiful on a day to day basis by random men. It is also nice for a man to have enough confidence to come up and talk to you, and be genuinely be interested in your responses. At the end of our night last night (or should I say-at 7am this morning), as we were walking from the club a stranger began talking with us. He asked us where we were from, why we were in BA -the normal stuff. He then hailed a cab for us and made sure it was our cheapest option. He told us he did not want two pretty American girls to get ripped off. It was just so nice, and so common. I can't possibly recount the number of times people have been so willing to help, displaying random acts of kindness.
As the days shrink in quantity, I cant help but be excited and sad about returning to the American culture. I undoubtedly miss so many things about it and still think it is the greatest place on earth. I have just become a huge fan of the Argentine warmth. The llittle extra attention to detail and little extra respect that they pay to one another is something to be learned and shared. I can only hope that I can take some of it home with me.
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